Article Archives:
Thursday, August 7, 2008 - This thing is hunting us. ALL of us. You know that?
The Predator may be the most deadly beast in all of history. I don't really know how the Arnold was able to stop him.
His cakemud to cool him down seems like it wouldn't last that long especially with all the flexing. Whatever. This quote serves as a warning to the rest of the league. The bumbling Brewers on the road are a thing of the past. We're going after everyone. We've already matched last season's road wins and we're going for more. 4 games over 5 hundred on the road? I'll take that satisfaction.
And I'm really enjoying how Suppan is talking, "We're getting to the point with this team that experience is taking over. The core of the team has played with each other. And there's a mix of other players. I think when you get a team with more experience you're able to understand situations, confront them and move on. You can see that maturity with our team." The Brewers are so mature- like me and also like peeing your pants.
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Wednesday, August 6, 2008 - If it bleeds, we can kill it
Edinson Volquez who? Oh, we were so worried about this all-star right-hander. Oh, we won't be able to take him down. Well last time I checked- he was a pitcher who throws balls that players have the opportunity to get hit. Meaning? Meaning he is basically the same as the Predator- and we hit that fool for all he was worth in a clobbering and redemptive win.
Very funny that the Prince fight was caused by a stray zipper. Cousin J was totally right that Parra kind of looks at the Prince like, "Oh jeez, I hit him with my zipper in the face and he's going to kill me for it. He's not even overreacting- that's an appropriate reaction for zipper hitting." And then the Prince was like, "Yeah! You better watch us bat and another thing [gets hit with the zipper] WTF? You little lady! Did you just hit me with your zipper? I'm going to shove you as hard as I can not once, but twice- and the 2nd time in your stupid face!" All I'm saying is don't ever hit me with a zipper in the face.
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Tuesday, August 5, 2008 - What's the matter? The CIA got you pushing too many pencils?
The tension of the crack commando team between Dutch (Arnold) and Dillon (Carl Weathers) is a great corrolary to the Prince-Parra matchup. Okay, not really. I don't know who would be CIA and who would be the commando. And I don't understand the tension that made the Prince explode. He absolutely looked crazy, huh? He's like a genuine crazy fire hydrant man with that shaved head and packed lip.
Everyone certainly got him surrounded and under control pretty quickly. This is when it would be the best to be in the dugout- to hear what actually was going on and then get some yells in at Prince, "what are you doing? Come on Prince- hit another dong!" I watched a replay with a Reds announcer- what a doofus, "they're falling apart in the dugout. it all started when they got swept by the mets in milwaukee [never corrected himself]. And now you're seeing it in the dugout and you'll probably see that leak into the clubhouse." I bet he wanted to go on, "that's it for the brewers. you might as well stick a fork in them, they're done- self-destructing like the hindenberg," but the other announcer told him to shut up by kicking him in his shins.
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Monday, August 4, 2008 - I Ain't Got Time To Bleed
That's right mothaflippa. As PREDATOR WEEK starts off with a bang, the Brewers are all business. So what if we laid an egg against Atlanta in the final frame of the three-game set. We're taking the travelling road show to Cincy and we're going to hunt down the Predator- future alien. I love how two actors from the Predator movie became governors in the United States. That is absurd. I don't know if there are any other movies that share that pedigree.
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Sunday, August 3, 2008 - We're killing them off one at a time.... like hunters
Oh yeah, the Crew is taking care of business in Hotlanta in a big way. I wish more dances and rap movements would come from Atlanta, or Milwaukee. I'm going to invent the Predator. In fact- this whole week is PREDATOR WEEK. Get ready for the business!
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Saturday, August 2, 2008 - Lit Up Turner
Last night was basically the scene in Predator where Dutch and the crew completely light up the jungle with guns blazing aimlessly trying to kill that friggen invisible freak alien predator. The Brewers didn't make up all four games in one night, but they definitely mowed down the Braves and sent a message. If you saw their faces last night, you could see that they were all business. Look for the mowing to continue throughout the weekend as the Crew stays hot on the road.
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Friday, August 1, 2008 - We're better than this
Whoa, whoa whoa, Ms. Lippy! The part of the story I don't like is that the little boy gave up looking for his puppy after an hour. He didn't put posters up or anything, he just sat on the porch like a goon and waited. That little boy's gotta think 'You got a pet. You got a responsibility.' If your dog is lost you don't look for an hour then call it quits! You get your a** out there, and you find that effing dog!
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Thursday, July 31, 2008 - Tragic so far
Clearly this series has not gone as planned. After the supremely exciting game 1, we've had our butts handed to us on a plate. No question about it we've played like garbage. All the small mistakes are unacceptable against a good team like the Cubs. Walks, errors, strikeouts on wild pitches turning into baserunners who score- NOOOOO!
Today's afternoon game is pretty important for my psyche and the Brewers. I want a win: 24 to negative 2.
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Wednesday, July 30, 2008 - Not Going As Planned
This kid was spending a long day at the office and doing some extra monitoring of the Brewers-Cubs game on the side. Everything was going as planned, it was a tight and good game. He checked the scores again in the sixth and to his surprise and consternation, his Brewers were in a large hole. "Probably too minor to be working kid, but you're hitting the long hours anyway," I know how you're feeling. What happened to us last night? Braun made a valiant attempt, but you either have to catch it or block it, not let it slide to the wall.
We've still got Parra today and a national tv audience to erase the mistakes of the last two games. Time to kick in the Cubs teeth.
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Tuesday, July 29, 2008 - Awww Man...
What an exciting game. We really had those motherflippas I thought. The defensive gems by Cameron's rocket to home and then the Prince's dive and shovel to a screaming Sabathia- a lot of meat on that play! And then there was Hardy's body contortions after CC's deflection- beautiful. Those defensive beauties inspired JJ and Braun to get back in the game with back to back sweetness dongs. Unreal!
And then our mistakes came back to haunt us- Rickie with that terrible throwing error. Admittedly, it was a tough slide, but he's got to stay in there a little longer or jump in the air- not take himself out. Torres also shot himself in the foot a bit with those 1-out walks. Ugh! 3 games to go. And the match-up of 2008 today.
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Monday, July 28, 2008 - The Showdown
The day has finally arrived and the series is here. The Cubs are making their first trip to Miller Park for 4 games. Did you know the division lead hangs in the balance? Did you know the Brewers are winning the season series so far and we've only played at Wrigley? And did you know the Brewers are pitching their 1-2-3 of Sabathia, Sheets, and Parra? Of course you knew all these things.
It's a regular showdown. I actually saw the short movie depicted in the pic. It stinks! It's a comparison of an old-time Western duel to a pitcher v hitter battle. The movie would have been my favorite of all-time if Sabathia were the pitcher. Would have received 4 stars from Duane Dudek, Oscar nominations for best picture and actor, etc.
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Sunday, July 27, 2008 - Mighty Mighty Brewers
I love Jen's comment from last night:
"YEAH HAW!!! Just came back from the game. Man, after Braun's dong, the place was electric. Then AFTER the game, when everyone is filing out, people were chanting LET"S GO BREWERS!! Strangers were high fiving each other." Stranger high fives are the best. Especially in Pick'n Save. Brewers fans are jacked right now and they don't care who knows it. Today is so awesome too. It's like Cubs-Series Eve. Honestly, I don't think the 'stros stand a chance today. We are going to clown them like we did when Stan Ross pulled the hidden ball trick on 'em in Mr. 3000. We're finally getting some of that national attention too. Bob Ley opened last night's highlights by raving about the "Mighty Mighty Brewers". That's right Bob, the Brewers are turnin' up the heat. And if you can't stand the heat in the kitchen, GET OUT IT WILL INCREASE! High five.
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Saturday, July 26, 2008 - It's alright, it's okay, there's something to live for
Well, we weren't going to go undefeated the rest of the way. The thing was, in that final inning, with Corey on-base, I thought we were going to do it. Apparently, all the players did too as they were all swinging for the fences and that magical tying dong. Parra pitched a beaut and got out of most of his jams, except for the costly bases loaded seventh.
How about that blood-curdling scream from Mike in American Movie? That was scary.
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Friday, July 25, 2008 - I'm a Broken Record
The Brewers are so good. I love the Brewers. This is the best I've ever seen the Brewers play. I could go on and on like this all day. What an exciting time. I honestly thought I was hallucinating when he hit that. It was unbelievable. La Russa's face was so priceless too. Complete shock and disgust. Frankly, I'd say this is beyond the '92 season. 7-0 road trip is a franchise record, 20 straight games with a homer is a franchise record, and winning 3 of a 4 game road sweep in St. Louis on last inning homers is definitely something I've never seen before. My brain just exploded.
I don't think we can praise Ryan Braun enough either. This was the 2nd game in the series where he was one short of the cycle. He just bypasses doubles- why wouldn't he go straight to third? His dong 2 nights ago for the 3rd insurance run was dope. And then he's the hero last night after asking Hall if he had one more in him. I love these guys too much.
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Thursday, July 24, 2008 - This Guy is a Horse!
CC Sabathia is too good to be true. I mean, he came to Milwaukee and immediately switched his website to show him in a Brewers uniform. Except for his first game jitters (where he was still very good), he has been a total beast- dominating 3 complete games, contributing at the plate with a dong and a double. He's talking about the team with the first person plural, "I didn’t really have any expectations. I knew we had a good team, I knew we scored runs and if I kept us in some games, I could win some games.”
My favorite part of the game was when the Prince celebrated the win with CC after the final out. They did a little hug, fist-pump thing and as CC walked away to get his daps from everyone else, the Prince wanted more and gave CC a huge slap in the butt. Great headline from The Onion, C.C. Sabathia, Prince Fielder Keep Imagining Each Other As Giant Talking Hot Dog, Hamburger. The Crew is so competitive right now. To walk into St Louis and break their will like this has been impressive to watch.
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Wednesday, July 23, 2008 - Can't Keep Us Down
Thrilling comeback by our boys in blue shirts and gray pants last night. Just a gritty, never-say-die performance. St Louis has to be pretty peeved that they let it slip away, though it wasn't so much a slip as we pried and stole it from their fighting hands. Billy Hall is my personal hero. Maybe he'll hit 1 more dong in each of the next 2 games to the exact same spot.
And as everyone knows, now the big dogs are pitching. Obviously there are no guarantees, but I'll take my chances with CC Sheets in any 2-game series. Goodness, I'm really giddy. I would have taken 2 games in the whole series at St Louis, but to get the first two. We're in tip-top shape. Man, I hate clowns though.
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Tuesday, July 22, 2008 - Wild Ones played last night
As Yost says, the first one in a series is always sweet to have. What's even better are the first two, superior is the first 3, and the ultimate is a 4-game sweep. Yesterday was truly a dynamic win. Our bullpen held strong with some of the cardiac kids in there- Mota and Gagne. It came down to Torres letting it slip away, but fortunately our guys gave him another chance. I love how he's a closer that can go 2 innings when necessary.
Rickie Strongs is certainly heating up. Maybe he heard rumors of the Durham trade and doesn't want to lose his spot. That's great news. He just needs a mentor like Durham to raise his on-base percentage by 100 points.
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Monday, July 21, 2008 - The Smartest Kid in the World
I was standing in the concession line at AT&T Park on Sunday for some Giroy Garlic Fries and a refreshing brew when I started listening to a 5 year-old kid behind me asking his dad questions. "Can I get a Super-Rope? Are those seats above us? Aahhh, they're going to fall!" Then he asked his dad, "Are the Brewers the champions?" I turned to the kid, "Not yet, son. But they're playing like champions." What a cap to the weekend.
The Brewers are awesome. We ripped up a formerly 11-2 pitcher, now 11-3, with effective hitting. Braun was just ridiculous with a 3-run dong and another 2 rbi double that was feet away from duplicating his first feat. The whole series consisted of tight games (couldn't tell by the scores), but the Brewers played the whole time like they expected to win. Confidence is key. Check out the accompanying pic from Saturday- all the fine travelling Brewers fans in SF (what up Fennimore!) and everyone back home have something to cheer about.
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Sunday, July 20, 2008 - SPLASH!
The Prince's 100th landed in the water- and what a shot to mark his heating up at the perfect time in the season. After Sheets got shellacked for 4 runs, I was worried and hoping he would get angry at himself for letting Sabathia outgun him. The 2 runs on the wild pitch were extra exciting to get it to 4-3. After Counsell's first-pitch out, I didn't have too much faith in Rickie Strongs, who was 0 for 2 in his first at-bats. But you know what he did? He came through for us and I love him a lot. Very exciting game that the Brewers happily took down.
This Sabathia move was so good it's making me sick. “We figured CC was going to watch one of his pitches,” said Braun. “But he wanted to watch one of his at-bats to see what went wrong. He felt like he missed one.” Outstanding dedication from the big man. I hope that Sheets and he get into a serious friendly competition to see who's the top dog. CC can push Sheets like no one else.
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Saturday, July 19, 2008 - Give it up for CC
This is how I was after each of CC's 10 k's last night. He just destroyed them- up and down the lineup. And then his double? Whoee, did he rake that ball. A lot of Brewers fans out and about too- with a lot to cheer.
There's a saying that the coldest winter you'll ever spend is a summer in San Francisco. It's true. The weather was mostly miserable last night in the left field grand stands. Moved down to some good seats later in the game- and they were warmer. Everything's better when you pay more!
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Friday, July 18, 2008 - The Next Dream Team
Sabathia, Sheets, and Parra. Are you kidding me? That's our lineup for the Giants series this weekend and I'm hoping it proves dominant. Seriously- those motherflippers are good. What makes this especially exciting is that I'll be in San Francisco for the weekend and will enjoy all 3 games in person. San Francisco- open your Golden Gate!
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Thursday, July 17, 2008 - Time to relax Prince
Straight from the Prince, “Early in the season I pressed. And that’s the frustrating part. If I would have just been [chill], especially in April, if I would have just relaxed, I would have been right.” I could do some relaxing for him. Imagine if Prince turns it around. We'll be dynamite.
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Wednesday, July 16, 2008 - What Excitement!
What a game! It was almost like the final baseball scene in A League of Their Own when the ball trickles, TRICKLES, out of Geena Davis' hand. Corey had the throw to extend the game and was just a little off-target. I was thinking would a good play to be to let it drop and throw it on the hop so they could get the force out at home? But that's idiotic. The runner would still be tagging, but the extra time for the bounce would make it not even close. Oh Corey! I know it's not your fault, but I was so excited for the World Series to begin at Miller Park, but now it looks like the Crew is going to have to win some games on the road to make this magical dream season a reality.
Slightly annoying how once it got to extra innings all the commentators talked about was the exhausted pitchers. Clearly everyone was hoping that the bullpens would get used up and they'd have to dive in to positional players pitching. Corey Hart on the mound? You better believe it.
Overall, good showing by the Brewers. Sheets was dirty with 3 k's in 2 innings, though he did throw a hefty 42 pitches! Braun and the Hartster were ineffective at the plate but they looked good. I think the big loser of the evening would have to be the Marlins' Mr. Ugly- 6 errors all season, and he had 3 last night. Ouch!
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Tuesday, July 15, 2008 - Derby Danger
Great showing by Ryan last night. I think the biggest worry for any batter is embarrassing themselves and not hitting any. Not for Ryan, he hit 17, made it to the 2nd round. Put a big scare in people that he was going to advance with 4 dongs in a row. I like his stroke and am glad he didn't have to mess it up with a ton of swings. Sure, he was overshadowed by the beast Hamilton, but that's okay.
Big congrats to Sheets for starting the All-Star game- a real and deserved honor. Hopefully the Crew can do a little better than the Prince last year. I remember one of the first plays was an easy grounder and routine throw to first- which he dropped. Oof! It didn't end up costing a run, but you're better than that Prince. You're an All-Star!
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Monday, July 14, 2008 - This Guy Can Do It All
He pitches a complete game and hits a dong in a 1-run game when he needed him to stop the sweep? Sabathia is the man. My one question to Yost, is how come you pitch hit CC (Craig Counsell) for CC (Christopher Columbus) in the 9th? Is it possible Sabathia is a better batter? I'm just messing around with that comment, but it's great that he's a true threat at the plate. I never understood why more pitchers don't pride themselves on batting and contributing more to their own wins. Pedro Martinez treated it like an absolute joke and goes to bat like it's a giant joke. Yovani and Sabathia have some pride.
My prediction for the World Series? Sabathia goes AWOL the night before Game 7 at Miller Park (his start). Five minutes before, no during the National Anthem, Albert Brooks persuades Sabathia that we need him and the Miller Park roof slowly opens to reveal a chopper descending into center field. Out walks Sabathia to begin pitching. His first pitch burns a hole through the bat and knocks Kendall down. Sabathia proceeds to pitch a no-no and hit a dong- the Brewers only run.
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Sunday, July 13, 2008 - Remember the Alamo!!
Well, the series is gone and now we're fighting for pride and to end on a high note and all that other good cheer. It's Sabathia's turn as the stopper- the last man standing. I'm confident he's the real deal. The Cubs' lead is starting to expand a bit. I imagine it would after performances like Gagne had last night. Yost said, "I thought Gagné's stuff was really, really good. He just made some mistakes out over the plate." Yeah, two dongs to the enemy sounds really good. It's bad when struggling relievers go out in mop-up roles and get clobbered (a la Turnbow). Not good for anyone's psyche.
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Saturday, July 12, 2008 - Smarter than the average bear
I love it when managers talk themselves in circles and aren't making any sense. “Cameron’s error, he ran a mile then looked up and the ball was in the lights,” Yost said. “That’s not an error, but it is an error. It’s scored an error but it’s not an error.” Huh? I guess he's making a good point. But 3 errors are a terrible point and that's why we lost the game and the Wild Card. Ugh. We should really win the rest before the break to stay hot.
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Friday, July 11, 2008 - Spiderman's True Identity Revealed
I was trying to look for something good Rivera did today (not much with an error and not throwing a thief out). I think his main contribution to the team is looking like a goofy and kind of chubby Tobey Maguire. I hope that Rivera milks his doppelganger for all it's worth. Dressing up in the spidey suit and doing jazz numbers at Hi-Hat. Seriously though, everyone is contributing. He gave Kendall a day off and called the right pitches for Bushie to pitch a gem with lucky 13 K's. Lucky 13 mothaflippa! And with the win (and a couple of losses), we are in sole possession of the wild card and a spot in the playoffs. Giddy up! I love us so much.
Congratulations to Corey and the key to my Hart and all Milwaukee fans for his first All-Star selection. No offense, but the All-Star selections seem like a huge joke with fans' clicking deciding who goes. Very impressive that Milwaukee beat out the biggest market of all in NY's Wright. I've always felt an inordinate amount of pride in the fact that Milwaukee is full of the best sports fans and that are tv rankings for sporting events are routinely higher than the national average. Kudos to the Brewers for being unable to contain their excitement, "A couple minutes into his news conference, about a dozen of his teammates rushed into the room and sprayed Hart and his children with beer, loudly cheering the news." Really? Spraying beer on the kids? I love it.
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Thursday, July 10, 2008 - Mota Crash!
That son of a b- he did it again. Mota made it look easy getting the first 2 outs, and I thought we had a chance- down 1 run with Miller Park rocking. And then he threw it away! We were totally in the game and Mota just blew it up. This wasn't as bad as the Arizona debacle last week, but it was pretty stinking bad. Cameron certainly did not help with a HUGE mistake that was charitably not called an error- allowing a run to score and turning a single into a triple (though I guess the point was moot when the next batter hit a dong).
I think Cameron's error is one of the more embarrassing plays in sports- charging in for a ball and then having it scuttle past you all the way to the wall. I think he could've run faster, no? Glendale Little League baseball tryouts 1991: grounders in the gym- 1 kid at a time. When it's my turn in the spotlight, the ball naturally skids through my legs. I turn and chase with all eyes watching and probably throw a 3-hopper that the catcher had to run 10 feet for. Humiliation is mine!
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Wednesday, July 9, 2008 - This is the way we roll, we roll
Great ovations for Sabathia last night- I think he's going to love Mil-town. We're so NASTY right now- it's like we're the bad guys in Space Jam- Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, Muggsy Bogues, and (I guess) Shawn Bradley. That movie was pretty awesome- getting pumped up for a cartoon basketball with the soundtrack of Jock Jams playing in the background.
I love how confident all the Crew is. All the players and coaches are saying, "I liked our team before and thought we were good, but now? Now I think we're really good!" I'm so impressed with Doug Melvin. When someone told him about the Cubs move for Harden he was able to guess 3 of the 4 players included in the deal. These guys know everything. Also cool, that the door is still open for more moves. The only problem with adding new players is we have to make room for them. And with our lineup, that's tough to do. Very exciting times for the Crew.
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Tuesday, July 8, 2008 - Unveiling a Hero
A little disappointing last night. I thought the momentous moment of the Sabathia signing would generate enough momentum for the night. Whatevs. The man is heading to the mound tonight. He seems excited to be here. The Brewers are excited to have him. The fans are THRILLED with 27,000 individual tickets sold last night. And I absolutely love Doug Melvin's words, "We're going for it."
Is this a free agent move on the same level as Reggie White? Obviously, it's a one-season rental as opposed to the signing a cornerstone of our team. But Sabathia has a great opportunity to make an extreme short-term impact and become part of Brewers lore. Have you checked out CC's website, ccsabathia52.com? He is already in a Brewers uniform, "Baseball is his passion. Family is his life.
The Brewers are his team."
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Monday, July 7, 2008 - Welcome C.C. Sabathia
Apparently we're going for it all this year. I got a text yesterday from Ross at Insomniac Ink (he makes all the great PYP gear) simply saying, "Sabathia is a Brewer." The Brewers, the team and the organization, are so good right now. Obviously our superb farm system made this trade possible. We have enough kids in the bank that we can make a trade like this and not mortgage the future. And then there's Attanasio, who's made a huge commitment to winning, and pulled the trigger on a nearly $90 million payroll. It's good that Attanasio is rich. Owning a team is basically the biggest toy a rich guy can have and I'm glad he's getting excited to spend that extra $5-10 mil for those 4 extra wins.
Throughout the Sabathia sweepstakes I was never convinced we would get the 6-foot-7, 290-pound lefty. The move felt like a stretch for the Brewers. No way small-market Milwaukee makes a move for the reigning Cy Young. That's Boston territory, that's New York, or even the Flubs. But WE did it. This giant stud is on our team now and about to join the hottest team in baseball. Get ready for Tuesday's unveiling.
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Sunday, July 6, 2008 - Rock Solid
Motocross guys are crazy. Some of the moves have names that make sense- like the Double Grab, Kiss of Death, or Lazy Boy. This picture is a move called Rock Solid. I have no idea why it's called that. But I DO know that's what the Brewers are now- rock solid and just crushing the Pirates' spirit. What a win (for Gagne). The Prince came through and took us to the house. I wonder if the Brewers have rallied around Gagne or if they don't like him like all the fans.
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Saturday, July 5, 2008 - Hardy Boys on a tear
Is JJ for real? 4 for 5? 16-game hitting streak? Extra good looks continuing? You better believe it. This guy's a stud and half and I love how he's taking over. All Brewers do is hit 10 dongs- minimum. "I think it was the best thing for me to take those days off. I think it's that, I think it's me being healthier. I'm just thinking about seeing the ball and hitting it, and it's just kind of falling for me. I'm feeling pretty good."
I'm going to use JJ's excuse to take 5 days off work. I'll come back re-energized, with a huge beard, stinky shoes, a couple of black eyes (3), a new outlook on life, an extra 5 lbs in my thighs (my problem spot). My boss will see me and say, "take another 5 days home skillet. Get your life in order or you're outta here." I'll bumble at him, "but all JJ does is hit dongs. I want to be like JJ! I WANt To be A RHARYDY BOYZYZYYY!..."
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Friday, July 4, 2008 - Uh Oh, Love Comes To Town
Fourth of July time is cottage time. And cottage time involves Mr. Freeze, fireworks, swimming, Connect Four, charades, and Talking Heads. With all that going on, it's easy to forget about what happened yesterday. This is going to be a great weekend. Cubs and Cards are going to beat up on each other while we steal the Black Pearl from Captain Jack.
Not to mention we might cap off the weekend with a brand new C.C. aaaaAAAAAAAHHH- WATCH out... You might get what you're after! Have a nice 4th everyone.
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Thursday, July 3, 2008 - Tell it to me straight Speech!
My first concert of all-time was Arrested Development at Summerfest in 1993. We were a group of 6th-graders going with a divorced dad and then afterwards had a sleepover at the dad's apartment/condo in downtown Milwaukee. The whole night we played hide and seek using the 2 elevator shafts, 6 elevators, and 20 floors- keeping everyone awake and acting like Mr. Wendal. That was awesome. It's great to see that Speech is still involved with Summerfest- but now he's selling corn! Nice move Speech! I wonder how much money he made off of Arrested Development. If he's working for the corn company because he likes it or to make ends meet.
The Crew is now 5-4 on this road trip after last night's win. Our rally in the 9th all started because of Russel's muscle. That wasn't an error by the 1st baseman, that guy risked his life trying to get in front of a Branyan grounder. "Get out of the way! Everyone move out!" Series win tonight...
Congrats to a whopping ten players from the Double-A Huntsville Stars are headed to the Southern League All-Star Game: Joe Bateman, Michael Brantley, Chris Errecart, Alcides Escobar, Mat Gamel, Steve Hammond, Matt LaPorta, Patrick Ryan, Angel Salome, and David Welch. We'll see you guys in the bigs soon. We should just trade all of them for Favre to pitch for the Brewers.
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Wednesday, July 2, 2008 - Roberto Clemente es el mejor
Anoche fui a La Perla para comer unos de los tacos ricos que tienen allí y me puse a pensar. El problema que tienen los Cerveceros es que no tenemos suficientes jugadores latinos. Tenemos algunos, como por ejemplo : Mota, Parra, Villanueva. Sin embargo no tenemos estrellas latinas. En realidad, no tiene que ser un problema. Podemos tener un equipo lleno de jugadores del planeta Marte, y a mi no importa si ganamos la Serie Mundial. ¿Verdad que sí? ¡Seguro que todos están de acuerdo conmigo!
Una cosa interesante con los beisbolistas latinoamericanos es que muchas veces no sabemos sus verdaderas edades. Mira este YouTube clip con Miguel Tejada. ¡Los reporteros de ESPN E:60 son unos pendejos!
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Tuesday, July 1, 2008 - Be Careful
2 in a row is not a good thing to lose. What I sort of like is that we're at a stage in the season where a 2-game slide is reason for concern. About a month and a half ago- it was commonplace. Let's keep it as an exception to the rule- the rule of winning and imposing our will on other teams.
Tough to salvage series wins when you lose the first one, but the Brewers, like every other sports organization like to play (and play better) when we have our backs against the wall, have a chip on our shoulder, have something to prove, our cornered, etc. etc.
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Monday, June 30, 2008 - Imaginary Bass
Kick it Cousin Jon! That's right- that's the man and the I Am Legend dominating a killer solo on the imaginary bass. He's being honored for his birthday on Friday- 28 years old! I wanted to get him a sweater, but instead gave him a phone call. Unfortunately for Jon, the Brewers lost on his bday, "which wasn't supposed to happen." They made up for it Saturday and then in a near collapse of the space-time continuum- Sheets got outpitched yesterday.
Better news is that the Cubbies got swept this weekend. As good as that sweep is, we still have to just worry about ourselves. One more battle in Arizona, and then the friendly confines of Miller Park beckon.
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Sunday, June 29, 2008 - Life Finds a Way
The Parra-dactyl overcame a lot today. He's dirty. He's nasty. He's a dirty, nasty player that gets wins all of a sudden. Did you know he's 8-2?!? That's extremely good. If you would have told me one of our pitchers not named Sheets or Yovani would have been 8-2, I might've shot you.
Great explanation of his winning ways from the man/dinosaur himself- Parra-dactyl: "I don't have to have my best stuff to do well as long as I'm going out there, being aggressive. It was just getting a couple of games with success and listening to (catcher) Jason (Kendall) and following Jason." On more than a few occasions this year, when a pitcher has made a mistake, he said it came after shaking off Kendall.
So is Kendall the best thing that happened to the Brewers this off-season? I hear poll question for Monday! Obviously I'm really pumped about the Brewers right now that I have a piece of floss hanging from my teeth (give it up for dental hygiene) at 2:31 Central time and I'm writing about the team that owns my heart. Did you guys know that Jeff Goldblum tried out to be an extra for Major League and was actually one of the Indians on the bench? That's not true, but it would be good. That guy is funny...
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Saturday, June 28, 2008 - That was a Wild One
What a game last night. Very disappointing that we ended up on the wrong side of it. As you know, had we won, we would've been tied for the wildcard spot!!1!! And only 4.5 back from the Cubs, who also lost. Can you believe it? These guys have come so far since that ugly part of the season and they should be very proud (I am). I'm so jealous of Cousin Jon and the location of his season tickets.
This game was in the bag, or so I thought, after Corey's 2nd dong and our dominant 5th inning, but then the doppelgangers answered right back in the 5th- getting McClung outta there. Those dongs back and forth were excitement personified in a baseball game- if a baseball game were a person. And if people are arguing that all the Brewers did was score on home runs and are a home run-reliant offense, while that was technically true last night, I don't entirely agree. Braun got on base with a double with no outs and then scored on a dong. But if that had even been a long pop-up, he moves to third, and then another one he scores. Hooray! Time to win the series now.
I looked over at first base and saw a white guy playing and for a moment I thought, "What the f happened to the Prince? Is he okay?" And then I remembered we were in an AL stadium and that motherflippa was the DH- resting on the bench/beach- eating sunflower seeds and other vegetarian goodies.
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Friday, June 27, 2008 - Bring on the Doppelgangers
We are one game out of the wildcard and continuing our march to capture the Cubs. Did you know that Baltimore was only the second team to win a series at Wrigley this year? The other team? None other than your 2008 Milwaukee Brewers! And we completed that task not once, but twice!
You know how the Brewers started last year 24-10 and we were the talk of the town. Don't look now, but we're 23-11 in our last 34 games. Not too shabby. We're going to have to keep this streak alive (a 3-12 streak is not helpful) against the Doppelgangers tonight.
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Thursday, June 26, 2008 - World Champions!
All is not lost in the land of Milwaukee. Okay, we lost last night and had a minor setback (we already won the series). To make up for it Sprecher Root Beer was crowned the best root beer in the world by Eric Asimov. I desperately hope he's related to Isaac Asimov and has some robots in his basement.
Anyways, Sprecher Root Beer is obviously super delicious. The dad of a friend of mine worked there and I was also dangerously jealous of him as he made claims to a keg of Sprecher Root Beer in his garage (I never saw it). My mom would occasionally buy a 4-pack (no 6-packs) and I would cherish and guard my bottle like the last drop of oil on this planet. Mmmmmmm. I think one of the weirdest things about being an adult is being able to buy as much Sprecher Root Beer (or Fun Dip for that matter) as I want. In honor of this award, the Brewers are taking the day off to enjoy Sprecher. So will I.
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Wednesday, June 25, 2008 - We're Unstoppable!
These early leads are much more comfortable than getting in early holes and having to claw back. I turned away from my MLB package for a moment and when I popped back on- we're up 3 zip? Fantastic. I suppose we couldn't make it too comfortable especially when Dave Bush is on the mound. I think our defense and his relievers just like to mess with Bush. "Thanks for getting us that lead Bush. Now we're going to get as close as possible to blowing it- just to make you sweat."
So incredible how we're 9 games over 500 and tracking down the Cubs. We're relentless machines from the future with one goal in mind- PIZZA PARTIES! Just kidding- overtaking the Cubs and winning the division.
The Sheets articles about his desire to test the market are slightly disappointing, but I guess we all knew it was coming (especially after yesterday's prophetic post- do not doubt the PYPFTB spies). It's tough to keep a guy down in his contract year. At the same time, some of the things he's said seem to show a desire to stay and he seems a little hurt that he wasn't offered a deal. "You can’t invite yourself back.” Asked how he felt about the decision not to negotiate, Sheets said, “You got it from the main man. My mind is always open to anything. That’s all I can say about it.”
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Tuesday, June 24, 2008 - PYPFTB's Deep Throat
So a PYP pledgee and informant (my brother) had his flight from Atlanta to Milwaukee delayed. Another casualty of messy airlines happened to be an MLB scout. The conversation quickly turned to baseball and any inside knowledge the scout might have. He mentioned Ben Sheets, that the Brewers brass had "absolutely no confidence in" Sheetsy and that there was "no way" he wears a Brewers uniform next season.
WHA?? No confidence in Sheets?! I understand the injury bug, but this man has been a beast. As Jen commented, he's an absolute rock for us. Anchoring the entire rotation with a will to win and a 9-inning mentality. He's 9-1 this year (a couple of sure wins blown by Gagne) with 3 complete games (and he was 1 out away a couple of weeks ago). What a stud. He's been so consistent this year and always wants the ball. I love him.
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Monday, June 23, 2008 - The Truth Is I Never Left You
Did you know that the Prince's favorite person is Evita Peron and he was just as disappointed as Argentina when Madonna was picked for the role? It's true. Recently, the Prince has identified with Evita and lived by her words. To paraphrase,
Don't cry for me Milwaukee Brewers fans.
The truth is I Never Left You.
All through my vegetarian years.
My not very productive existence.
I kept my promise to hit lots of dongs.
Don't keep your distance.
Whoee! With 16 home runs now he's heating up and trails Braun by 4. Even though Braun is ahead in slugging, the Prince is actually slightly ahead in average and has a big lead in on-base percentage due to his 38 walks (Braun has 16). This feels good though, right?
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Sunday, June 22, 2008 - Redemption!
Another 1-run win? Getting it done McClung. He sounds like a detective that I would not want to mess with. Maybe a little bumbly, but an effective detective.
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Saturday, June 21, 2008 - We Crashed
Okay, so it's not as bad as the stock market crash. But I am in my apartment right now at 4:30 am central time, and I've probably had a little too much to drink and should wait for the morning for my head to clear and I'm just sitting here eating cereal and reading Brewers coverage. So what? The Brewers lost a game and the Flubs were down 3-1 and managed to win. So what if I started with Apple Jacks ('94 we eat what we like (what up cottage?!)) and now I'm on to Corn Pops? So what if my 1% milk somehow froze in the refrigerator and now I have to eat my cereal with whole milk? That's not a big deal. I can take it. And so can the Brewers. Big shame that we couldn't put any runners in the dugout (after scoring runs) when we had bases loaded and no outs. SHUCKS!
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Friday, June 20, 2008 - Best of Times and Worst of Times
Two halves of yesterday's game (though the bad half was only 2 innings long). It started out so awesomely- looked like a Brewers romp showcasing offense and pitching where the players could get silly in the dugout. And then things got really scary. I know a win's a win and that's all that matters, but we need a killer instinct to put games away. I'm just glad we're not heading on the road after last night. We got the sweep and gained some ground.
Dave Bush was phenomenal. The Prince got his 2nd career in the park dong (though not as impressive as his first). And now it's a series against Baltimore with Cubs and Cards in tough series.
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Thursday, June 19, 2008 - Anything is POSSIBLEEE!!!!
It's nights like these that I'm proud to be a Brewers fan, an American, and a human! Do you know that every single day I wear at least one piece of PYPFTB gear? Yesterday it was two pieces with the 07 shirt and a limited edition one of a kind hooded sweatshirt. Unlike Disco Stu, Brewers Mike and the PYPFTB executive committee NEEDS to advertise. I was at a grocery store and the 30 year-old stoner and checker asked me about the sweatshirt. After I explained the site, he responded, "That's cool man. I'll check it out. I'll definitely check it out..." YES! One more convert for the cause.
Yesterday was fantastic with the high slide, low slide combo from Corey and the Camaro. Russel the Muscle should be careful with those dongs- they're TOO big! Sheets is such a competitor it makes me sick sometimes. I love him. This is the first time we've been five games over .500 since April 23, when we were 13-8. And how's that feel Cubs? Against some real competish on the road you fold like a card house made of Kleenex.
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Wednesday, June 18, 2008 - World Champions!!!
Congratulations to Ray Allen for finally grabbing that championship ring and Sam Cassell and his huge balls on his third. These guys were two fantastic players for the Bucks and I'm glad to see them succeed (even though I'm extremely sick of the Boston train in all professional sports and all this bologna about their fans who already had 16 championships deserving this). My only fear is that (just like we had Ray and Sam I am in 2001 and were on the cusp of a championship) we'll see Ryan Braun and the Prince celebrating their first championship in 2015 with the Mets or some other rich franchise. Don't let history repeat itself.
If we keep playing like last night- I don't think there's too much worry about history repeating itself. Wowee! Great pitching by the Parradactyl- that somofabit@* is really getting good. And then all the dongs? Come on! It seems like we're a team full of Russels with Muscles.
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Tuesday, June 17, 2008 - Things are percolating
Games after a day off after the day in which we salvaged a series by winning the last game and avoiding the season sweep- Brewers are 84-4. Did you know that? Not a real statistic- that's why. I just made it up off the top of my head. It would be better if it were off the tip of my tongue like an autistic stud. Quick recommendation to all of you- check out the YouTube of 2007's Spelling Bee Winner doing a CNN interview. It's something special.
I do like the rest of this homestand though- 6 more games starting.... now.
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Monday, June 16, 2008 - I Have A Dream
I dreamt last night that I was on the Lakers and I was on my way to the airport for the flight to Boston. I was biking with Pau Gasol and Derek Fisher through the streets of LA and giving them a pep talk on how all of us needed to play extremely hard- because THE NBA CHAMPIONSHIP IS AT STAKE! We'll see if my inspirational words will make a difference. If they do, I should begin inspirational dreaming- a new service for the 21st century.
This is an interesting homestand against 2 more AL teams. Our pitchers should make a big deal about acting cool when they bat and then really go ofter the AL pitchers when they're batting- chin music, extra curves, moonballs, etc.
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Sunday, June 15, 2008 - The Big Man's Agony
Oh Prince! Why didn't you hit it a touch harder? And end the game in dramatic fashion. I guess it could be like Joshua Jackson's lesson to Emilio Estevez in Might Ducks though (Estevez's childhood shot on a penalty shot hit the post). Jackson told him that an inch more to the left and it would have completely missed the net. Good point, Joshua, but how about Russel the Muscle's shot in the 9th? Yes! Giving up 5 runs in the 12th is hard to recover from.
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Saturday, June 14, 2008 - Liars!
Minnesota prides itself on being the land of 10,000 lakes. Well I've got news for you buddy! Wisconsin has more lakes than you. Your license plate and your entire culture is a lie!
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Friday, June 13, 2008 - Popping off
9 home runs in 24 hours? Get outta my face with that statistic. Let's give it up for the Prince (with a not too shabby 11 dongs), Hart (rocketed up to 10 after the last 2 days), Cameron (who needs some encouragement after striking out all the time and letting that ball sail over his head yesterday), and Kapler (the young man's gift that keeps on giving). I really love Ben Sheets- he's been so freaking dominant this year and relatively injury-free. Can you imagine if Yovani were still kicking it? The possibilities are endless!
PS- There are now over 7,000 of us PYPers.
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Thursday, June 12, 2008 - Home Run Barrage
Great offensive game by the Crew. Just knocking around homers like Mickey Mouse killing 6 flies with 2 swings- and then the Giant challenges him to a strength contest and Mickey uses his WITS to outsmart the giant- throws a bird that flies away (giant thinks he throws a rock forever); squeezes water from a rock (a piece of cheese); and then does something with a straw- not sure what. It's not really like that, but that must've felt great to get that offense unplugged.
Very good to see Guillermo Mota finish up strong especially against his disastrous outing last Friday where he put the team in a 4-game funk. Getting 2 strong innings and the save from him is great for extending our bullpen's life- keeping the other guys fresh like my basil.
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Wednesday, June 11, 2008 - I Peed My Pants Last Night (Practice)
I don't know what's been the matter with me lately, but as I walk up the stairs to my apartment door I have to go to the bathroom so badly. This time- I didn't make it, a little spurt came out, but the great thing about doing this website is I can say it's practice. Unfortunately, with the way the Brewers played (Sloppy!) it doesn't seem like I'll ever get to put my practice into actual pledge-fulfilling use.
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Tuesday, June 10, 2008 - New-Fashioned Duel
Time to visit Texas for a duel with those jerks from Houston. Lets put them in the bottom of the barrel. We're nice and rested after the Monday day off (who likes to play on Monday anyways?). Time to reassert ourselves and get back to winning ways. No more sloppy play, no more blown leads. Just wins baby.
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Monday, June 9, 2008 - No Holds Barred
Great win by the Crew on Sunday- to semi-salvage the series. Pitching Torres for 5 outs before the day off is a nice move. I think it's safe to say that Villanueva could have gone more than 1 inning (10 pitches). I still can't wrap my head or stomach around that HUGE blown game on Friday. UGH! That game should have been played No Holds Barred- or at least with the "rule about not pitching Villanueva more than one inning if it's a 3-run game" barred.
Here's some insight from a fellow PYPer Izak about Mr. eggs Oddorizi, "I used to go to high school with jake odorizzi and I'm really pumped that he got drafted by the brew crew. He's really good. If you didn't know he let up only one run this season and just recently won the highland high school a state championship. He also is a pretty good hitter. I could see him doing a rick ankiel and maybe turning into a position player if the pitching doesn't pan out. OR maybe we could use him as a releif pitcher and pinch hitter. Does anyone remember Brooks Kieshnik. He was my favorite player."
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Sunday, June 8, 2008 - Hot as Ice
Unbelievable. Are we reverting back to the bad ways so quickly? Bush gave up the big inning- in the first- which is always nice! Being in a 5-run hole from the get-go. This is embarrassing that we lost this series to the Rockies- the dregs of the league. Ahhh! How can we be so hot at home and then waste all that positive momentum? It all goes back to Friday's game and the Mota man putting us in this hole.
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Saturday, June 7, 2008 - Throw out the rulebook Ned
This one is going to make a lot of people mad. A tough one to end the streak on. Ned didn't keep pitching the lights out Villanueva because it was a save opportunity with 3 runs. If it was 4 runs, Mota doesn't pitch, and Villanueva probably finishes out the game with another 10 pitches. Super frustrating. The only problem here to getting mad at Yost is that Mota has been working great the last 14 outings- and this was his one blow-up. It happens from time to time.
I was watching the game at a bar and when a friend showed up and we were up 4-1, I was telling him that it's great but the Crew didn't look too happy. He countered that they were composed winners. Well, the streak is over to a bottom-feeder like the Rockies. What an upsetting game- it's hard enough to get ahead games- you can't throw them away like this.
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Friday, June 6, 2008 - The Future Is NOW
With six picks of the first 62, the Brewers were able to make quite a dent in the Draft- and plan for the future. This is how franchises get built, especially for small-market teams like us. Baseball can be frustrating because there is very little immediate, short-term satisfaction. We won't see any of these young draft picks for two years. Except maybe Lowrie who plans on making it to the bigs in 1.5 years. I love his confidence and am thrilled he's getting favorably compared with Braun. Can you imagine two Brauns? We'd be unstoppable.
More than Attanasio, our scouting team and farm system has been the biggest reason for our improvement into a contending, exciting team. Our roster now is so exciting with all the young kids on it (it's always a little weird when you past that age threshold and most of the players you root for are younger than you). We've got the Prince, Braun, Corey, Rickie, JJ, Yovani, and Manny. I really get shivers thinking this core could be there for a while.
Now it's time to take our streak to the road. This is where we make our move.
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Thursday, June 5, 2008 - Corey the Hitman Hart
Corey is so deadly- he slays the opponent and women whenever he tries- just like my favorite wrestler growing up- Bret, the Hitman. The main difference is that Corey is American, so if we chant USA while he's batting against Dice-K it's not as erroneous as when wrestling fans (and me at home) chanted USA as Bret was wrestling Yokozuna in the early-mid 90's.
Corey is so tall and gangly- extremely fast on the bases- gets lots of slapping hits when he's down in the count- and for whatever it's worth- he seems like one of the nicer guys on the team (plays ping-pong with JJ while Uecker creepily watches). So I couldn't be happier for him and his inside the park figure four he hit yesterday. They mentioned it in every segment of Sportscenter. Not to take away any of his thunder, but can you believe the Prince hit the last in-the-park dong? How did he keep those legs moving?
Things are going so great for the Crew right now and us fans. I'm just loving it so much. This is how we were meant to have been playing.
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Wednesday, June 4, 2008 - More Like Mr. 7000
With 6,992 pledgees ready to pee their pants, I'm excited that we're approaching the 7,000 plateau as things are going so well. Who's Mr. 7000 going to be- Bernie Mac or Cedric the Entertainer?
Quick story- my older brother (lives in New York, was at Yankee stadium for Joba's debut) called my younger brother (at the game). At that point, we were down 1-0 and things were tight. Older brother told younger brother to call him back when Ryan Braun hit a homer. Literally 3 minutes later- the phone rang and the Crew was up 2-1 compliments of Señor Braun!
And it appears things are heating up in the comments section as well with the appearance of some friendly Cubs fans. There's some talk about who is classy and who is not. Let's ask Randy Johnson who left the game to respectful applause from Brewers fans. "As a visiting player, that meant a lot," the Biggest Unit said. "That's pretty classy and I won't ever forget that."
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Tuesday, June 3, 2008 - Heating Up
Well-fought game by our boys last night. It's amazing how much better everything feels and looks when we're winning like this. The whole team is playing better these days. And the Prince was HUGE last night- with the infield hit, the stolen base, and obviously that huge dong he hit with impeccable timing. I love these guys!
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Monday, June 2, 2008 - Yost on a steamROLLer
Whooeeee! That certainly feels good, doesn't it? Usually in sports I always root for close games so they're more interesting to watch, but if it's my team- I definitely want the laughers. I can't handle the stress. Brewerandy made a great comment yesterday about Yost's recent shrewd moves. Kapler taking over for the k-king Cameron paid off.
Have you seen Kendall's stats for throwing thieves out? Kendall has nabbed 16 of 37 (43.2%) runners attempting steals. A year ago, he caught only 13 in 124 attempts (10.5%) the entire season. This is from the Jedi master Yost, "His mechanics were very solid, time after time after time. The only thing I could see was the runners were just nipping them every time. He was waiting back to catch the ball before initiating his release. Now we have him moving toward the ball. So, instead of - bang, bang - being safe, they're out. As soon as I saw it, I knew it would make a big difference."
Exactly, it's the bang-bang difference. I saw it too, but I wanted Yost to get the credit. And yes, "Steamroller" was the title of August 22, 2007's entry where I mentioned Strange Brew.
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Sunday, June 1, 2008 - Solid Gold
"We're back to .500? Good," said Sheets. "Now we can go forward." Obviously this headline doesn't make any sense, but who cares? I was trying to find a picture of the Solid Gold McDonald's by Southridge. I love that place and the piano-playing moon head.
I know Sheets was mad about getting taken out, but I'm okay with Yost's move. It's fantastic that he's a true competitor and wants to finish HIS game. At the end of the season though- it really won't matter if Torres got the save or Sheets the complete game- all that matters is that extra W. And I would MUCH rather have Sheets at the end of the season even if he has one less complete game on his belt. His duel against Berkman was long and exhausting. No doubt he could have finished Lee off- but why take the chance? Good move Ned.
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Saturday, May 31, 2008 - 500- Here We Come!
Today is the day the Brewers reach the 500 plateau. Hopefully we can march beyond it and stay on the steeper and more advantageous slope of winning more games than losing. I don't want to spend anymore time in the stumbling, bumbling hell of losers. We got to this point with a stunning performance by the man Ryan Braun. That guy is so good- he's definitely taken the leadership role of the team this year through his outstanding performance. I'm hoping the Prince can get his hotness back and get a contract signed as well- but right now Ryan's the man.
I would be dishonest if I didn't say I was not not a little disappointed in the response to the Attanasio scoop. There were some technical difficulties with the picture not loading until later in the day- but come on! Who is that lady? Poor man's Tina Fey?
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Friday, May 30, 2008 - Shirking Responsibility?
I don't usually like to talk about other sports because this is a Brewers blog and the Brewers need the press when they can get it. But I do make exceptions when the other sport is newsworthy and Brewers-relevant. As I was watching the Lakers-Spurs last night, always on the lookout for the next PYP topic, I spotted an Attanasio for an instant. Using my excellent detective work (DVR) I was able to generate the accompanying screenshot.
Do they really look that alike? Or is Mark spending time in sunny LA and abandoning his players as they went for the sweep at home against Atlanta (maybe that's why they got crushed- no owner inspiration)? Or more probably- that is brother Paul- screenwriter of Quiz Show, Donnie Brasco, Sphere, and The Good German. Either way- incredible seats.
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Thursday, May 29, 2008 - Rickie Weeks' Present
In honor of Rickie Strongs coming through in the clutch- I'm sending him a bike for three. Three as in the number of licks it takes to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop if you are a cheating owl. We're clawing our way back to the top of the charts- game by game. Sweeps are the key.
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Wednesday, May 28, 2008 - Billy Hall is Clutch!
Did you take shop in high school? Are you a car mechanic? Can you identify the picture as a clutch? I cannot- and I am a certified bridge maker/designer that worked on the Holt Bridge. Maybe they should have checked my skills a little more before awarding me the project.
How great was Billy the Kid Hall last night? Gets on the bag- hustles to second. And then the steal!? I was extremely nervous when Cameron had strikes, but he came through. The play at home was a closey, but my kid Billy got it done. Looking at the schedule, I don't see any losses coming up.
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Tuesday, May 27, 2008 - Poindexter Gets it Done
So I had a little bit of a brain spasm yesterday and talked about Branyan as if he were a hot young player working his way up the farm system. Oops. To make up for it Cousin Jon aka Poindexter submitted some analysis on May 19th. Though it's a little old- it still makes a fine point and I can't wait for the Brewers to be back at home.
The Cubs, conversely, have feasted on a schedule that featured a majority of dates at Wrigley in the early going, and Chicago has played the fewest road games of any team in the majors, with 17. (One other team has also played 17--Arizona, which perhaps not coincidentally is the only team ahead of Chicago in the overall standings.)
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Monday, May 26, 2008 - Are you in the office today, SUCKER!
Oh man, not only does it suck to be a Brewers fan for you with this win one and lose one mentality and actual occurrence of events, but you're in the office! How terrible. Take a long lunch break and don't return- EVER. Cool beans? Cool beans.
It appears as if Branyan is the real deal though- is that the truth? Can he play 2nd? See ya Rickie!
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Sunday, May 25, 2008 - Disco Stu Doesn't Need to Advertise
Hot and quick points for the beginning of summer and spring finishing up. 1) I just saw some birds doing it- and by it I mean making babies. It did not look very satisfying. 2) Seth is a good bunter and pitcher. 3) Branyan will be better than Braun. And 4) Did you see Turnbow had 15 walks in 4 innings? He's really gone crazy I think. Poor guy.
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Saturday, May 24, 2008 - A Little Embarassing
So I made a bit of a mistake yesterday with the poll. I had two sets of answers up. I'M SORRY! But do you know what I did, I took responsibility for my actions and rectified it. The Brewers are not doing that- they stink again.
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Friday, May 23, 2008 - OBAWRISPWTDTOPFW2f1WNCI
Translates to: Our batting average with runners in scoring position was truly detrimental to our prospects for winning- 2 for 11 will not cut it. RISP also stands for Rhode Island State Police- not as tough as Milwaukee PD- get down motha flippa.
Great to get the series win of course- but we got that yesterday. Sweeps will get us out of this hole and funk we're in. Sweeps will get us out of this garbage in the bottom of the division. If we want to content- we've got to sweep like Ma Bell did when fightin' Joe Dimaggio was out shooting down Keiser fighter planes in the Revolutionary War- to protect us from the French and earn our right to keep the Philippines and spread democracy through the fields of the universe.
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Thursday, May 22, 2008 - 5 foot Nothing
5 Foot Nothing. 100 and Nothing. That's how the Brewers got to play like Little Napoleon with our hands in our front breast pocket and Uncle Rico picking on us. "You got to add on," Sheets said. "These two wins are nothing now because they're done."
That's right Sheets. Those wins don't mean nothing because they're in the past. Hakuna Matata means no worries for the rest of your days! What kind of lesson was Hakuna Matata really teaching? We need the awesome poster (mea culpa for not knowing the name) to chomp on that one a bit and see how Hakuna Matata fits in to the Hegelian dialectic and whether it's teaching the kids to be nihlists like Ryan Braun- who just hits TRIPLES!
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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - Climbing to the top
Up and up and away we go. We're going to climb the ladder to the top of the pop charts... starting now- no now. NOW! The ladder we will be using is much sturdier than this one, but hopefully a lot less humorous. Who knew how funny falling was?
Honestly, what is Gagne's problem? We had a nasty victory that all you can take from it is positives and then he has to screw it up by giving up a 2 shot-dong and make us worry about him again. Is he hurt? If that's what he needs to do to save face- cool beans. All I want to be is positive, Gagne makes that difficult.
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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 - It's a Barrel of Fun
If this barrel represented the NL Central rather than a barrel of fun occupied by monkeys- we'd be at the very bottom. That's right, the Brewers are in the dungeon, the doldrums, the worst, etc. with a substantial losing record. One good thing is we've been playing like poo and are only this far back. We need 2-3 real hot stretches and we'll be right back in this thing.
How did Barrel of Monkeys get so popular? Are they that much fun? No. It's all the same toy- over and over again. And it's frustrating when you try to make a big chain and they just fall. AAAHHHHH!
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Monday, May 19, 2008 - Sports Illustrated Curse
I think the curse might be deserved after a pic like this one. Where did Uecker get that swimsuit? And why does he get to hang out with the boys like Mr. Belvedere? Looks a bit creepy if you ask me. (larger image of sweet swimsuit here). Really great showing this weekend on the national stage by our gutsy guys.
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Sunday, May 18, 2008 - Not Cool
Those two errors were more than a bit embarrassing. We're wasting the national stage- looking like amateurs. Ryan Braun should one-up Manny (nice catch) in left field by making a diving catch and then making tea and biscuits for a Brewers fan in the crowd (me) and then throw a guy out at home- followed by a game-winning dong! I hate Boston!
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Saturday, May 17, 2008 - Congrats Mark DeFelice
What a great story- working for 25 years in the minors and then finally makes it to the Majors and wins the Cy Young for us and pitches in two Game 7 wins as he hits a homer for a kid sick from eating too many s'mores (me). DOUBLEHEADER TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Friday, May 16, 2008 - Slipping Up
Get ready for a terrible extended analogy: I was just taking a shower and as I reached to turn on the cold (it was scalding hot)- I slipped and was doing the whole Bugs Bunny waving my hands, spinning my legs thing- trying to stay up. I nearly broke two glasses on the sink, knocked my toothbrush to the area behind the toilet (gross), and nearly ripped the shower curtain down. I had a brief flash-forward of actually falling and breaking my melon in two. Luckily, I'm part ninja and regained my balance.
I think the Brewers season right now is kind of slipping up in the shower. After the Cards series and first game against the Dodgers- I thought we had righted ourselves and were back to washing the armpits. But Sheets exploding for 6 runs (not on offense) was a difficult pill to swallow. We need to install a slip-resistant mat. Maybe we should bring up the Polish Sausage to run bases.
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Thursday, May 15, 2008 - All Tied Up
Ryan Braun's 7-year deal will be announced today. That's fantastic. He really is a huge stud. Sometimes during the season, I'm just focusing game-to-game and forget about the overall team's strategy for several years. Well, not Doug Melvin- that's why his name is Dougie Melvinie per Yosty.
In case you didn't know, the Internet is a scary place. Image searches for "tied up" can lead to some frightening things. Also, PYPFTB had a tremendous uptick in traffic last week due to a post about us on a site in Denmark devoted to women peeing their pants- WEIRD!
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Wednesday, May 14, 2008 - Cheers to Gagne
So the link to the training vid is back up. Don't notify Big Brother at MLB because apparently they like to knock down awesomeness. I think the training might be useful again after our offense's showing up again and the great get by Gagne.
He asked for the ball and Yost trusted him. He gave him the ball. Then Gagne pitched (with the crowd behind him). And man did Gagne make it interesting with the single and the walk and the huge rip out to Corey in right. But you know what? He got the W.
Torres was dominant as usual- giving two 1-2-3 innings. And Ryan Braun is the king! Did you see the stat that he's the fastest player to get past 40 home runs? He did it in 352 days- 2 days faster than McGwire.
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Tuesday, May 13, 2008 - Oh my God, We're Back Again
Brothers, sisters, everybody sing
We're gonna bring the flavor show you how
I've gotta question for ya
Better answer now
Am I original? (yeah)
Am I the only one?
(yeah)
Am I sexual?
(yeah)
Am I everything you need?
You better rock your body now!
I think if you substituted the Brewers offense for the Backstreet Boys, you'd be right about who's back in town. That game was awesome! Ryan Braun is too good to be true. Does he look crazy to anyone else? I'm not sure how much I trust the guy because he's so dang serious. That's cool. Get all serious Braunie and keep having 2-dong games.
Great pitching by Bushie. A little weird that Gagnie wants his job back after giving up a run in 2 innings. And what's up with 4 walks? Who cares- we just took 3 out of 4 from the stinky Cards.
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Monday, May 12, 2008 - Happy Birthday To Us!
PYPFTB launched one year ago (5 days ago) on May 7th! It's been a long road everyone and hopefully it can end this season. The goal of this site is the same as a hospital's- to make ourselves extinct. I don't want sick people and I don't want the Brewers not in the playoffs. VERY encouraging performance by our pink bats yesterday- and the closing mechanism worked to perfection.
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Sunday, May 11, 2008 - I stink at closing
I guess that's it, huh? Gagne is done as our closer. Do we have to keep paying him? At least he took it like a man though and told everyone he stinks. Like Michael Hunt says, he is a man- and I feel bad for him. But how can he suck so hard? Who's the new closer? I hope the new one breaks Coco's record.
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Saturday, May 10, 2008 - Oh YEAH!!!
Rickie Strongs comes through in the clutch! What a victory for our boys! I was so bummed after the sixth- with the runners on the corners and nothing to show :( . But then we had a two-out rally- so demoralizing for the Cubs. I'm so happy for all of them!
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Friday, May 9, 2008 - Playing Dead
Was playing dead really our strategy last night? Were we thinking if we didn't play the Prince, Corey, and Kendall that the Marlins would let down a bit. Well, it didn't really work out that way as they pummeled us and delivered the second sweep in a row. Maybe in the next game we should try some other tricks- like the inbounds the pass while someone goes on all four and barks or we could try some cliassics from Major League. This is so frustrating and will require some serious winning streaks to overcome. We're 2 games below 500 and in 4th place.
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Thursday, May 8, 2008 - It's Always Darkest Before The Dawn
That's what Harvey Dent (Two-Face) says in the trailer for the new Batman movie. And certainly once could say it's getting pretty dark for the losers with our 5th straight loss and another anemic showing by our offense. "These guys don't like this, so there is a bit of frustration," said skipper Ned Yost. "I wouldn't say there is tension, but they're working very hard to get themselves out of it." Maybe it's time for some tension, huh?
But I think there's an even more important question- "Is that even true about it getting dark right before the dawn?" I don't think so. It's obviously darkest in the middle of the night. I guess you could say that once it starts getting light that that's dawn- so of course by definition it's going to be darkest (or darker before the dawn) since dawn is when it gets lighter. But I don't think you can count it like that- dawn can't start at least until 4:30 or so. I think 2am is darker than 3am. QED. Unlike the Brewers, I win.
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Wednesday, May 7, 2008 - Aahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Okay, I don't know if the Brewers got the memo from yesterday. My love is unconditional, but to a point. Does that make sense? No, well who cares. The Brewers stink like a turd in a pool or an egg salad that has been abandoned behind an unused couch. Shutout? Come on hottest bats in the league. I like the fire Ryan Braun is showing- that's right. Get angry and good!
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Tuesday, May 6, 2008 - Get it out of your system
All right everybody, I saw a lot of venting on the boards yesterday. Totally understandable. Now that it's done, let's get it out of the way and concentrate on positivity. I know it's a business and there's a sense of a blind fan being a sucker for spending all the money to make the players and owners rich. That's not how I view sports though- and none of you either. I don't want to be fans like the New York Mets that boo the team every time they make the slightest error. Our boys are trying out there. Our managers and coaches want to win. We have a new owner that is pumping money to the team.
I don't know if we and our cheering or booing really make a difference to the team and their performance, but I like to think so. The Brewers are already playing another team- they don't need to be fighting their own fans too. Listen, I know Gagne stinks. I just love the Brewers so much and want them to win and rattle off 10 in a row!
An astute fan alerted me to change the 24 year-playoff drought to 25 in the PYP pledge. That's done now. I think 25 years is enough.
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Monday, May 5, 2008 - Breakdown- no survivors
That was an extremely rough weekend. After getting hit on Friday with the whole Lamborghini Gallardo torn ACL, the Brewers rose to the challenge and got swept. Obviously the Lamborghini going down is terrible, terrible news. He was definitely our #2 pitcher and some could/would argue ace material.
I was watching the game yesterday- saw 6-2 and Mike Cameron with 2 dongs and thought what a nice storyline for Mike and a great way to end the weekend. I checked back in and it was 6-4 in the 7th. A little nervous, but we still had things under control. Someone told me we lost in the 12th and I was flabberghasted- how can Gagne keep doing this? What's so frustrating about him is that he blows BIG leads- 2 and 3 runs. The heart attack machine needs to stop with that guy. 5 blown saves. Last year all of those are wins- and we're in the top of the standings.
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Sunday, May 4, 2008 - Tough Times
Thank goodness baseball isn't like horse racing where they put down injured players ON THE FIELD! Poor Yovani- I know he'll live to see another day. Also- quite a race going on in the NL Central. If we could have do better against Houston- we'd be in first. Time to avoid the sweep and tear things up.
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Saturday, May 3, 2008 - Bad News
Yovani is gone. And I miss him already. This news is the equivalent of someone taking a dump on your chest. That's never happened to me, but I'm using my imagination and it seems appropriate.
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Friday, May 2, 2008 - Win of the Season?
That really went down to the wire, huh? What an exciting contest- back and forth- a lot of weird things going on (Zambrano dong). But we ended up on the winning side of the ledger and took the series despite a -10 run differential. The two defining moments for me were the doubles that zoomed by Soriano and Fuk-Yo-Dome in the 9th. Each of those could have gone the other way.
Such a fantastic game I don't want to take anything away from it- but the aggressive base-running was quite poor. Both Prince and Rickie were out by a mile (we can be satisfied with runners at third). I know the Prince collision at home will be made a big deal, but it wasn't that powerful of a hit. The Cubs catcher had so much time to collect himself and position himself at an angle to the plate that he almost ole'd him like a bullfighter- with Prince taking the brunt of it. Oh well- bring on the Stros
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Thursday, May 1, 2008 - Uncle!
I give up. I give up! What an amazing game plan by Yost. It's really genius actually. After playing possum and getting thrashed in Game 2, the Cubs think we're a complete joke and we'll be able to sneak away the series today in a gutsy win by our boys in gray. The Cubs erroneously think that run differential is good for something. It's not! They can be +5 in the series with over 34 runs, but as long as we have 2 W's under our belt- I'm cool. Poor Turnbow though- he really threw himself under the bus with that performance.
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Wednesday, April 30, 2008 - Battle-Tested Veterans
And that's the difference Cameron makes. He's a battle-tested veteran that works hard, plays hard, and has lots of medieval weaponry in his locker. He uses his weapons mainly for demonstrations of his vast skills. Bo skills, mace skills, falconry skills, etc. But there are times when he'll have to use his weapons to lay down the law, basically for intimidation purposes. I heard it from a guy who definitely knows that Cameron unsheathed his broad sword after a game during Spring Training one time because someone (I'm pretty sure Suppan) casually remarked that Charlemagne is an overrated king. Obviously, Cameron would have none of it.
Kudos for a great victory in the soon-to-be-named Mars Field. It's going to be a tough series fo shizzy.
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Tuesday, April 29, 2008 - We tease him a lot because we've got him on the spot
I wish Kotter played for the Brewers this year- the whole gang- Horschack and the smooth Barbarino. That was actually the style back in the day though. The 82 Wallbangers could pretty much be the cast for Kotter with their killer hairdos.
What a day, what a day, what a day! We've got a lot going on- some hello's for Cameron, Sheets, and the Cubs and a see ya later to David Bush. Let's hope Sheets can be as dominant against the Cubs as he was in the opener. And Cameron playing us will be quite exciting- this is our lineup now- back to awesomenes and some order.
I like getting all the series at Wrigley out of the way early in the season because they don't count. Did you know these games technically don't matter? They're like the primaries in Michigan and Florida. Just kidding- obviously they count, but it is true that the games at the end of the year count more. I'm going to be so pumped that Miller Park will host the final series against the Cubs. Our guys can enter a raucous and confident crowd where hopefully there will be a little skin laying there on the chopping block. I'm not sure if the goal is to have your skin cut or not- I would imagine "not cut" is the goal, unless it's a hygiene thing.
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Monday, April 28, 2008 - Foofy
There was an article in the New York Times Sunday Sports section about the Prince being a vegetarian. It was funny because it describes Milwaukee as if written by an anthropologist, "Earlier that day, the parking lots at Miller Park were characteristically sizzling with tailgate barbecues — most of them featuring the fatty bratwurst that are all but Wisconsin’s state vegetable. This is the stadium, after all, that during every sixth inning stages a spirited race among five humans dressed as different varieties of weiner product, from Italian sausages to chorizo."
I want to see the stupid author watching the sausage race (why does he call them weiner products?) and not knowing how to cheer. "Good show! What a jolly good show," he yells at the end.
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Sunday, April 27, 2008 - All Hail The Prince!
This was the game of the Prince most definitely. He's like a choo-choo train on that suicide squeeze. I really do love him- he's my big bear.
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Saturday, April 26, 2008 - What a Majestic Animal
Have you ever seen an actual Marlin? They're truly incredible- you'll be on the boat deep-sea fishing and it'll jump in the air and then dive a million feet down. 10 seconds later it pops up 100 feet in front of the boat as the boat is going full-throttle. They're like torpedoes. Scary to think that those monsters are in the ocean! Again, we had our chances last night- bases loaded and all that jazz.
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Friday, April 25, 2008 - Poor Soup
We certainly had our chances last night. Runners on the corners with no outs in the 7th- no production. We paid for aggressive base running in the fourth- but that's okay. It's important that we push it and go for the jugular whenever we can. It's a shame to waste Soup's performance though. One run is a very solid performance. And then Burrell's hit with two outs and two strikes- that's dagger to the heart material. Two-game series are annoying with no victor. I'm a fan of odd game series.
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Zing!
"It didn't bother me," the Prince said, who started a vegetarian diet in February. "The only thing is you got people saying it's because I don't eat meat or whatever. But my thing is a lot of people in the stands and you guys, you guys eat meat all day and you guys can't hit a ball."
Phenomenal point by the Prince. I'd be a complete carnivore if it weren't for my girlfriend (who insists on really fun tofu nights and other awesome events like yoga followed by poking myself in the eye), yet I could never hit the longball. It might have something to do with the poor eyesight of my left eye reducing my depth perception- it's a common occurrence in many artists because it helps them see 2-dimensionally and thus draw better. I am actually a terrible artist though too.
I swear I was planning on a weekend poll of who was going to emerge from their slump first? the Prince, Braun, Turnbow, or Gagne? Little did I know the Prince and Turnbow would do it on the same night. Big huzzah for those two! I really love how emotional Turnbow got about it all. To be honest, I'm a little emotional right now too, but that might be because I'm watching Steel Magnolias with the lady.
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Wednesday, April 23, 2008 - Another Barnburner
These extra inning games sure are exhausting. When you win they’re worth all the anxiety (can you imagine losing that 22-inning marathon? Ugh), but there certainly are some signs for worry. Gagne continues to struggle- putting two batters on with no outs? That’s garbage. The extra $4 million for Coco sure looks like a bargain now. And the failed double play due to Rickie Weeks’ weak toss? Unbearable! And Prince- scoop that up to end the game buddddddy!
As they say, a win is a win, and at the end of the season- just the total number matters- not how we got them. Frustrating that if we hadn’t blown that Reds and first Cards game we’d be on a very sweet little (bordering on big) winning streak.
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Tuesday, April 22, 2008 - Old Faithful
As a precautionary measure, Yost is holding Sheets back on Wednesday and he'll miss his first start of the season. Oh man. Why does this have to happen so early? It's a really a shame because he can be so dominant. I feel bad for him because all his injuries are knicky-knack things- a pulled triceps or lat, a really bad hangnail. It's not like he has a knee that continues to blow out and you know he should be put down like an old horse.
It's a shame for Turnbow too- he got his chance last night and did not convert. He's been griping a bit that he's a mop-upper- but with his haircut- can you blame Yost? Zing! If he wants his spot back he needs to perform- no question.
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Monday, April 21, 2008 - Big Ups to the Pope
I'm not going to take the blame for that last loss. My post wasn't a jinx because we actually won the game in the 10th- like we normally do. And then Gagne blew it- AGAIN! Have you seen the stat that from 1999-2006 he had 7 blown saves out of 168 opportunities. From 2007-2008, 7 blown saves (3 this year) in 29 saves. I know it was 4 days in a row, but no excuses. This is downright worrisome.
In other news, big trip by the Pope this past week. I'm half-Polish and fondly remember trips to Polish Fest seeing shirt that said, "Happiness is having a Polish Pope" or "The Ultimate Ski Weekend [listing names like sobieski, woznalski, kernescevski, etc]." Being the Pope is like being the best baseball player- a mass at Yankee Stadium and people love him, constantly cheering, and he keeps raising his hands to the people and smiling real big.
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Sunday, April 20, 2008 - Extra Innings Are A Done Deal
What is going on with the Brewers? We must be deathly allergic to innings past the number 10. Why? Because all we do is end games with a vengeance in the 10th- whether it's the top or bottom- no matter to us. Even though red is my favorite color and my bedroom was painted red as a young child, I'm digging the Reds-killer Billy Hall. He produces runs at the timeliest moments. I like how we took care of the hot Johnny Cueto- one publication said we solved him like the Pythagorean Theorem. A squared + B squared = a sweep!
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Saturday, April 19, 2008 - Oh No!
This is so worrisome. I know Yost and the crew always goes in saying it's not a big deal, that it was just a precautionary measure. But then it turns into a big deal and Sheets is gone for a month and we're on a 4-20 slump. Ack! Poor Benny- he's so dominant on the mound too- just shutting those Reds down like sub-prime mortgages. Someone should staple or tape his triceps to his lat together- or give him a massage. I'd do it- not a big deal if it helped him out. We need you Ben.
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Friday, April 18, 2008 - In Their Own Words
"As soon as he hit, a big weight lifted off his shoulders, and a big weight lifted off our shoulders as a team," reigning NL Rookie of the Year said.
"I was trying to act tough, but I couldn't hold it," the Prince said. "It was like a Little Leaguer. I was jumping up and down like a little kid."
"You've got to understand how long the season is, and you've got to understand players getting in sync," Yost said. "He hits them in bunches."
"You've always got to promise yourself you're going to be as positive as you can, no matter what," the Prince said. "It was actually getting easier, to tell you the truth, the worse I was doing. I just kind of realized that whatever's going to happen is going to happen."
"I got myself into a jam and I got out of it," Gagne said. "That's just a lot of positives."
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Thursday, April 17, 2008 - Slow and Steady
These early holes are not good. Our bats need to come out popping and so do our pitchers in the first couple of innings. Maybe our strategy is to be slow and steady for the whole season. I think we need to use more tricks like the wily tortoise who beats Bugs Bunny. Is this the only cartoon where Bugs Bunny gets exasperated and trumped? I think so. Very interesting. Usually he's so cool and calm and makes all his opponents literally release steam from their ears. Please let's avoid the sweep tonight.
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Wednesday, April 16, 2008 - True Story!
As a kid my dad worked extremely hard so that his son, me, could live the American dream and start a blog about peeing pants when the Brewers make the playoffs. Additionally, he also rewarded himself with a sleek, fast sports car which was way cooler than the one featured on right. We were driving one time and there was a flutter in front of us, unable to escape our car's ferocity. When we got home we looked inside the grill and there was a poor, defenseless bird stuck there- dead. It was a cardinal and it stayed there for what seemed like months (there was no way to extract it). I don't really know what I'm saying except that Cardinals should be careful when crossing the road- GO BREWERS!
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Tuesday, April 15, 2008 - It's Cardinal Hunting Season
Let me break it down for you: in the picture on the right, the St. Louis Cardinals are represented by the cardinal lying on the road. The Milwaukee Brewers are either the road or the car (out of the frame) that hit the cardinal- destroying it, or a combination of the road and car. The point of this picture is not that I don't like cardinals. I actually love them. Seeing a bright red cardinal in the dead of winter is a true treat. What I don't like are divisional opponents and especially the St. Louis Cardinals. We will crush them like a car crushes a cardinal.
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Monday, April 14, 2008 - Mr. Met Takes a Beating
So I wasn't actually at the game, but this is a picture from last year's season where I taught Mr. Met a lesson. Notice the unofficial PYP gear at that point. We've really made strides. Last year, we lost the series and this year we took them down 2 out of 3- progress! What a game yesterday! Oh yeah! The team staying calm after that 6-2 deficit, Soup always battling, and all those doble plays! Another big NL Central match-up coming up.. Let's see if we can keep the sure-to-be-important tiebreaker edge in the division.
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Sunday, April 13, 2008 - Indestructible Sheets
Sheets should really be 3-0 right now, except for the opening day stinker gagne tossed to the fukodome. What a commanding performance after the shaky 1st and getting out of the bases-loaded jam in the second. So much for the pitching duel. Strongs, Old-Man Gabeo, and Bill Hall (who's bringing his stroke back) really made him pay. Let's see if Cousin Jon and Stanley can will them to win the series.
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Saturday, April 12, 2008 - Parra Down
A little bit of a slide, slide, slippity slide right now. That's okay- no time to panic. It would have been great if Parra could have pitched a little longer, but - whatevs. I don't know if I'm worried about the Prince just yet (especially with that sweet double). As long as he doesn't get worried- I think we're cool. Here's hoping Cousin Jon and Stanley have a better time at Shea today and come home with a win.
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Friday, April 11, 2008 - Thoughts on the Stadium Pal
Thanks to Jeffrey for bringing the Stadium Pal to the attention of PYPFTB. Usually we pride ourselves on being up-to-date on all Brewers and PYP-related news. Unfortunately, we missed the boat with this one. It is a portable urinal, focusing on total hands-free operation, using a silicon sleeve connected to a tube to a bag that attaches to your leg. The site mentions other uses like pub crawls, mardi gras, iron butt rallies (look that up- I'm not going to ruin how awesome they are and they may deserve a later post), hunting and fishing, concerts, flying, physical therapy, and they also claim it makes a great gift. Genius? You better believe it.
The PYPFTB stance? Clearly using a stadium pal is not an acceptable method of fulfilling the pledge, but in a general sense, the product is great for everyday use.
First series loss? That's okay. Let's take the day to regroup and then stuff it in the Mets' faces. I know Cousin Jon is making the trip to Shea with Stanley. And some other PYPFTB pledgees will also be there. Enjoy the company!
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Thursday, April 10, 2008 - Well, It's a Marathon
The stinker had to come eventually. And like they always say, the baseball season is a marathon. Similar to the picture on the right of an intrepid marathon runner- they can be brutal and you can want to die and their are lots of ups and downs- but you know what? You keep going, that's what. And if we can get 2 out of 3- that's going to be a great series and a spectacular season. I'm a little bummed for Dave Bush- not sure how this will play out with his lack of options- especially because we did have the lead in the late innings before the crumbling. I want my Yovani more than MTV though.
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Wednesday, April 9, 2008 - Bill Hall Wants Costume Back
Billy Hall throwing from his knees on the spin move? Talk about Web Gem alert! Combine that with JJ Hardy's pick-up off the Suppan deflection and we've got some handy pieces of foot/handiwork going on.
Obviously, this Reds series was going to be a reflection on off-season moves created by the Coco switcheroo. And though we didn't see Coco on the mound tonight, we definitely saw some of the repercussions with Gagne blowing his 2nd save in 3 chances. The thing is- he wasn't doing so bad- got the first 2 outs- and had 2 strikes down for the save. Baseball's a funny game in that all it takes is one swing to change psyches and futures and fortunes. Anywho- let's hope Gagne takes the right lesson from this one (not sure what it is). I'm not sure how often our offense will be able to bail him out in extra innings (great tough-guy training for our younguns). No doubt we'll see Coco or the aftermath of his departure soon enough.
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Tuesday, April 8, 2008 - Popular Brewers Need Protection
The Olympic Torch sure is popular. Parisians were so desperate to touch the hot thing that the French high command decided to send in their elite force of crack troops [pictured at right]. Yes, that's right- France's elite team of enforcers scoot around on rollerblades. All you need to overcome them is a bag of marbles, even gummy bears would work. Anyways, if the Brewers get too popular- which is a very real possibility this season- we can call in the French rollerbladers to keep posers from jumping on the bandwagon.
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Monday, April 7, 2008 - He's [Gabe Kapler] On Fire!
So Gabe doesn't play for a year, but then comes back to get 2 dongs in a row. He's on fire along with everyone else! Sheetsy's complete game was methodical. His dirty curve made quick work of the soon-to-be swept Giants.
And then our offense was unstoppable- putting together 1-run innings with small ball until the dong fest began. Great 2-strike hitting by the super serious Ryan Braun. Corey Hart had a great slap up the middle that left him laughing as took his gloves off at first. Greg P makes a great point in the Comments about the Prince. I'm worried he's just swinging for the fences and some of his at-bats are a little ugly, but if the vegetarian is batting .364- who can complain?
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Sunday, April 6, 2008 - Parradactyl is Unhittable
Whoee- Manny Parradactyl has some pretty fine stuff. Getting up to 97? I think it would be awesome if every Brewer had an alternate dinosaur character as their inner spirit. Then, when things get really close and intense in important games they can do some magic and take the field as brontosauruses and catch every fly ball and then hit dogs. Unfortunately, T-rexes are unacceptable even though they're some of the coolest dinosaurs- they have short arms- so would be ineffective batters, pitchers, fielder, and boxers. And Gabe Kapler should take a year break every year. Kudos to Gagne on his first of 40 Brewers saves this year.
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Saturday, April 5, 2008 - We Really Gave It To Them
Are the Giants okay? I'm a little concerned for their feelings. We really whupped them good as the Crew put on a great show for the home crowd. Batting through the order is always fun. Two at bats for the pinch-hitter? YES!
Billy Hall, how much we missed you! Let's keep Opening Weekend rocking.
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Friday, April 4, 2008 - We Won't Let the Fascists Win
The fascists struck twice yesterday. First, with the Cubs win. Second, I was disappointed to see that the YouTube video from a dedicated PYPFTB pledgee was taken down for copyright infringement. What is that- copyright infringement? More like too awesome infringement? I bet the police had to take it down because too many minds were being blown by those amazing special effects. That's okay. Hopefully our intrepid off-season trainer can get something else up that fits within the realm of copyrights and accepted levels of awesomeness.
Tough loss yesterday. It started out well with Rickie Strongs being a man. Everyone enjoy Opening Day!
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Thursday, April 3, 2008 - Send George W to Wrigley
I know G Dub has a lot to do right now, but I'm sure he'd love the assignment. Wrigley Field needs him to clean all that brush from the outfield. What's up with that? It looks like trash. I'm worried a forest fire is going to start up in that tinderbox of old, dry brambles.
How good is it to have a two-game lead two games into the season? Very good. I love Stanley's nickname for Rickie Strongs- who knocked that fist pitch into heaven. And what's up with Corey Hart stealing bases like they're kittens? That guy is a manimal out there. I don't mean to brag, but that reminds me of the time (true story) when I stole 8 bases in one high school game. That's right, eight. My other high school baseball highlight is one I had two errors on the same play- but that's another story.
Best quote of the game has to come from the Salamander Torres, after taking down Soriano, "To be able to get one of the best hitters in the game right now," Torres said, "that was me being a man." Everyone raise your glass to the man.
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Wednesday, April 2, 2008 - Off-Season Training
Okay, you guys are a little bit crazy. It seems a PYPFTB Pledgee went above and beyond the call of duty this off-season - training just as hard as the players for 2008. I like the commitment, I like the amazing technology this person used to seemingly warp around space and time, I like the PYPFTB gear he's sporting, and maybe most of all I like Todd Rundgren!
We're going to need those things all season and against the Cubs tonight. Go get 'em.
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Tuesday, April 1, 2008 - 162 and 0
I was looking at the schedule last night and I couldn't see any games that we're for sure going to lose. Given yesterday's performance, I think we have a real shot at goi